Babies need a healthy connection with their parents and caregivers to feel secure and to adapt to the outside world. Some parents feel a special bond as soon as they hold their newborn for the first time, but for others the bonding process may take longer. Bonding continues as your child develops, so be easy on yourself and know that it may take time to develop a stronger connection. By meeting your baby’s daily needs, you are actively creating a healthy bond.
Here are some additional tips on how to build a healthy connection between baby and caregiver:
- Make eye contact and talk to your baby. By the time your baby is born, they can recognize your voice. Doing activities like reading and singing together will create bonding experiences. Seeing your baby’s expressions and reactions will also help you start to understand their likes and dislikes, too!
- Soothe your baby with noises or movement. Your baby has spent their last nine months swishing around in the womb and listening to your heartbeat, so they love noise and movement! Calming sounds nearby (Ex: white noise machine or fan), dancing, swaying side to side, or doing bouncing movements in a dimly lit room can all help to soothe your baby and create a bonding experience.
- Never underestimate the power of touch for your baby. Skin-to-skin contact is beneficial for both you and your baby (just be sure you are fully awake and alert to avoid increasing risk of sudden infant death syndrome – more info about that here). Contact with your newborn also helps to stabilize their body temperature, heart rate, and stress levels. Using a sling or carrier is another way for your baby to hear your heartbeat to help them relax and feel comforted. Breastfeeding or bottle-feeding also allows for close snuggles.
- Most importantly, remember that you are enough. Bonding will continue as your child develops. Be patient with yourself and your baby. It’s okay if the laundry piles up and you don’t know what day of the week it is! It may be that right when you’re feeling overwhelmed your baby smiles at you for the first time and you realize you are starting to bond with them. Also – you always deserve some self-care time. Check out our article on the importance of self-care as a parent.
If you are feeling concerned that you and your baby have not started bonding, that’s okay! You will make it through this season. Contact a Family Support Navigator for additional ideas and resources at navigation@familyfutures.net. We also have additional resources on bonding with your baby that can be found here.